Death Journal #4 It's a Conspiracy!
Dear Journal,
Entry #vier. Today is Chad Michael Murray Day. As the semester wears on, I’m beginning to question the sanity of my professors. As I opened my textbook to do the assigned reading questions for my Western Civilizations class, something was amiss. I don’t care how many times you look, but you’re not going to read about the Epic of Gilgamesh in a chapter titled “Classical Athens”. Another one of my professors is convinced that cats are framing raccoons for the recent garbage can tipping schemes going around Buena Vista. Preposterous. It’s the hamsters framing them, clearly.
At one point in my philosophy class we began talking about some guy named Occam and his shaving situation (sometimes I question the subject topics in that class). Occam prefers a single razor blade since it’s ‘simple’ or something. As for me I prefer a Gillet 5-blade razor – they’re much nicer to your skin. Who’d have thought we’d talk hygiene in philosophy? What’s next, watching Arthur in class?
Until Spencer Patrick Day,
The Student
